I honestly cannot remember the last time I wrote a post. I don’t remember the last time I set aside time to work on something not work or school related, if I’m being honest. Let me explain what kind of hurricane I’ve been living for the past two months.
June: I start working six days a week. I also start summer classes. Middle of June, on a Thursday afternoon, I drive myself north of Chicago (yay adult moment!) to spend a weekend with one of my favorite people. We do the tourist-y things and have some deep talks. Like, deep. We also go to a Hillsong concert and I decide that I’m attending the Justice Conference* next year. I promptly return home Sunday afternoon just to re-pack like a crazy lady so I can work at a church for a week. Note, I spend that week commuting between work and camp, which is over an hour drive. And these kids (yay, 7th-9th graders!) are a bit…hyper. Like, I’m just spending evenings with them and they are wearing me out. I cannot imagine what the other staff are experiencing all day long. The next week is my vacation week AKA take a week off of work to be at the 5th-6th grade week of camp (my favorite age group, just sayin’…). The following week I go back to my usual work-and-school routine.
July: Two weeks of work, school, and not much else. Then a return trip to camp to be “assistant to the dorm mom” for the second group of 7th-9th graders. I am, again, commuting between the camp and work. That week I am stressed, blessed, and coffee obsessed. But I wouldn’t trade a moment with those kids for anything, even if they almost outnumbered the staff 10:1. The following week I return to my world of work and school. I wrap up my summer classes, get A’s in both, and decide to never take another summer class again. My family and I take off to Saint Joseph, Missouri for a weekend. I love the things we go and do, but I kind of want to ditch my family the entire time (I don’t like travelling with them). Turns out, Missouri Western State University** is kind of cool. My dad really wants me to go there. I also finally tell my mom that I’m thinking about signing up for Mission Year*** after community college. I’m not sure how she feels about that.
August: We get back from our mini-vacay. I go back to work. It is the most stressful week I’ve had since I started this job five months ago. I go home to eat chips and watch a lot of Criminal Minds and Law and Order. Because that is what makes me happy. I go out to dinner on Friday with a friend that I haven’t seen all summer and we get to catch up.
That brings me to today. I drove to friend’s house to pick her up for a farmer’s market, but the plans changed. Instead, we lounged around on her sofa, watching the U.K. version of The Office and playing with her super cute Dachshund puppy. Normally a change of plans freaks me out, put this week has been so stressful. I am exhausted, both mentally and physically. At this point, Kujo could jump out from behind the couch and eat me and I probably wouldn’t freak out.
This upcoming week brings me hope. I have TWO days off. I’m spending one day with a friend who is getting ready to move away, which that idea is just now sinking in. The second day I hope to do an insanely deep clean of room, because it desperately needs it. I’m going to finish the book that I have been reading ALL SUMMER. It’s not even that long of a book. I just have no time to read any more. I’m also going to fill out my new Passion Planner****, which I am super excited about. I am a disorganized person who keeps every aspect of her life stored in her phone. Time to get that on paper. It’s also time to start figuring out my life.
When I was in high school, I often said no to certain things because I had to work. And while I in no way wanted to shun my work duties, I didn’t take full advantage of being high school or being a teenager. A friend of mine kept telling me that there would be time to work when I’m older, enjoy my life. I didn’t listen. I’m going to be 20 in less than a month. I will no longer be a teenager. I didn’t take advantage of that time. I spend so much time working that I don’t take care of myself. I can’t change what my past has been like. But I want to change my future. I want to take better can of myself. I want to find balance between work, school, and the rest of my life. I want to figure out what I was meant to do. The goal for the next few weeks is to lay the foundation for a new chapter in my life. I don’t plan to go into my twenties with everything figured out. But I want to go in with a plan.
I want to take a second to thank everyone who has been apart of the happy moments in my summer. Kayla and Kenzie, for letting me relish in my Chicago tourist phase. Emily, Liberty, Hannah, Bethany, Kim, and others for being my camp girls, my friends, and providing some much needed laughs (and for saving me delicious camp food when I had to rush off to work). Maddie, for being the best camp intern/nurse/dorm mom ever, and for being my confidant through those three weeks of camp. Cole and Christian, for being awesome male interns and always being ready to give me hug after a long day at work. Lexi, for letting indulge my inner six year old at the zoo. And to all the friends that I didn’t get to see but have texted constantly because why not? This has not been the best summer ever. But it has been one of reflecting, learning, and growing. I’m excited to see what the future holds. Hopefully more time to blog, haha.
Basically, thanks everyone, for everything.
End of thought.
WHAT’S THAT??? BEHOLD THE LINKS!!!